(Halo2, Earth, Private Peter Larkhill) 

Re: “Hey babe! DON'T WORRY! I'm OK!"

The hell you mean “I'm OK”?! Birdies say your battalion got hit bad. The hell were you doing out in Kapetown anyway!? That place is a damn nuke site! And I don't buy that “classified” bullshit, I think I know what you guys were up to...

Speaking of which, I saw a Spartan today. He looked awesome alright, but I swear right here and now, I am NOT going anywhere near one of them again. 

I DON'T DO SUICIDE!

Seriously! I was really thinking things are going to look up now. Having a walking tank with us. But having one around is like a damn bullseye on our backs. He led us from ambush to ambush! We were supposed to be LOW KEY! But he got at LEAST 4 platoons on us. 

The guy can't really drive either. Ran over Peterson, and blames us for being crummy drivers. Also, the bastard weighs half a ton! I had to lean WAY out of the passenger side to keep the car from turning over! 

Oh and Super-Special-Forces training my ass. The guy blindly ran around the corner right into a brute patrol... not nice. Brass blamed us in the loss of a “valuable asset”, they having me on weapon maintenance duty now. The gun-lube smell is never going to go away. I hear Johns got assigned to KP duty, Gallahan... I don't wanna talk about her, it hurts even to think about it.

But yeah that's about it. How are you? Really. 

Love

Pete

(The “obligatory” Halo themed marine Email)